inequaltiy is equaltiy

Well, i wanted from a very long time to write something like this. Below are some of my observations about , well you will know when you read below. Well its not like it is true for all of them but i can be sure of one thing ,for majority of them it will be true. Anyways its my blog so i can write anything :) and before you start shouting there is always comments section if you know what its for-

1. When a girl says yes it means no and when she says no it means yes . When she says yes sometimes it may mean yes and sometimes no, when she says no sometimes it may mean no and sometimes yes . When she doesn't say anything it may mean both yes or no, and she only does that to see what you do and blast you after that(In this case even god can't save you) . Confused, i don't think any single living man soul will not be confused, So let me tell you what to do. Remember one god you believe the most and do a "Akkad bakkad bambe boo, Assi nabbe pure sou" and select between yes and no.If your prayer was true then god will save you from her fury. And haan if you don't believe in god and by any chance your Akkad bakkad bambe boo went wrong even god can't save you.
2. This is a theory invented by me and proved many times by others-: The stability in a group of friends depends on the ratio of boys to girl in the group. If the ratio is just equal to 1 the group is just stable and the ratio more higher than one more the group is stable. And by god's grace if the ratio is less than 1 meaning number of girls are more than the number of boys then be prepared to loose your nights sleep and days rest. Its just like an uncontrolled nuclear reaction it will spread and spread until my theory is satisfied , for some fools who don't understand, it means that till the number of girls are lesser than boys. I have the most unlucky chance of experiencing it myself many times, well that is another story altogether and i will write it when i get the guts to do so.
3. I think of all of us, the mobile phone is best used by the girls. Obviously it's quite useful in some situations. This theory is again invented by me from careful observation over a long period of time. You will never see a girl walking alone , i mean you can see a girl walking alone but you will never see a girl walking alone without being on phone. I extend this to you will never see a girl alone without being on phone, obviously when they are not in office or home. when they are in cab sitting alone or walking from main road to reach home or just a stroll to reach office they are always talking. (updated on 23 may 2008)
4. The girl will always try to prove that she has not done any makeup and looks beautiful naturally even without any makeup even if she has spent 2 hours in front of an mirror before coming out of the house.Nobody knows why can't they simply agree with it.But well if it is with a girl it can't be simpler. There is an unconfirmed report that one lady started getting ready from 9.00 clock in the morning for the new year party which was supposed to start at 11.00 clock at night.Anyways the main point is everybody knows that they are lying including them so they have come out with a new plan. I went to a get together last weekend and suddenly out of blue one girl asks me, what make up i have done before coming. Shocked, surprised i looked at their faces, fresh just out of bath, properly brushed or whatever and i touch my face and its all sweaty. All the girls started laughing saying that today's boys do more make up than girls. I don't know about others but all make up i have done my whole life is a Fair and handsome cream and Axe deo that too only after bath. I was frustrated and in that frustration got a new point for this blog.(Updated on 16th July'2008)
5. Tubelight girls : Have you ever made a joke to a girl or made any funny humorous remark in front of her or told any pj to her. Then you will know what i am talking about. I will tell you the exact reaction you will get. You tell the joke to a girl, she looks at you for some time. Then comes the condition, some may ask you that she didn't get the joke and then you go on explain her and kill all the fun of it.Others will just laugh without any idea of what the joke meant.I have lots of examples to prove this but i will just give two of them. There is new show called "nach ke dikha" where there is a dance competition between girls and boys group. I watched the show some days back and saw that the boys were making some funny remarks on the girls and they were having difficulty understanding. There was always a gap and then they used to laugh. Even the show judge Malaika Arrora khan had the same problem. The cameraman was trying to hide it but it was clearly visible. And the second one is one day me, Pandey and other friend were wandering around when we saw a girl driving and made the comment "If you are scared of women driving then get off the pavement". As obvious she didn't understand and we spend half and hour explaining to her that your gender is a bad driver. (Updated 17th July'2008)
6. If you are scared of women driving then get off the pavement : This title too is self explanatory. Just some time back i went out of office for tea and saw that a lady was trying to park her car. She was trying do it for 5 minutes but clearly her huge efforts were not paying of. A security guard saw this and came to help her, he went to back of the car and was instructed her when to turn the steering left and right. Everything was going fine until the lady got excited and went back too much fast and almost crushed the guard in the wall. The guard moved just in time and came out very scared. I started laughing , the guard saw me and joined too. The lady threw us a angry look and went away. So if you want to live longer then follow some basic rules as i do. If you are driving and see a car trailing you with girl driving it go away from it as soon as possible, if she is asking for pass , give her as soon as possible(You can be cent percent sure that she doesn't know which side to overtake from, so plan accordingly). If a girl is driving and you are thinking of overtaking her, forget it immediately as you don't know which side she will go the moment you try to overtake her and hit you. And last if you are walking and see a girl driving just pray to god even if you or on a footpath , because then the only safe place is the sky.(Updated 17th July'2008)
7. Computer skills -
8. I don't know how many of you will believe me but a girl just asked me when we were on the escalator going to Inox, What will she do if the escalator stops suddenly?

Well that's all i can think of now, but i will add more from time to time. In the mean time give your comments also, may be i will add it :)